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Thanksgiving in Maldives

Thanksgiving in Maldives
via Etihad & Malaysia A380 First Class
December 2013

To C56 and our first look at the impressive BA whale.

British Airways BA269
London Heathrow (LHR) to Los Angeles (LAX)
A380
3:00P-6:05P (sked)
4:05P (cancelled)
December 4, 2013
Seats 2EF

Our "First Class" non-treatment continued with boarding, first with handicapped, families with very small children and then "First Class, Business Class, Executive Club elites and One World elites". Half the plane rushed the Fast Track lane.  On a positive note, there was a private F-only jet bridge to 1L. Once on board, it did seem that BA has greatly improved its hard product (seat comfort, IFE) although in the end still not in the same league as the other A380s we've flown... EK, LH, KE and MH. A tour around the cabin...

And the "Suite".

While not wide, the seat itself was actually very comfortable... with sufficient plushness for my taste and size. IMO, far more comfortable than some of current generation of firmer F seats like super firm LX and even moderately firm LH. But these seats not very wide and the overall feel of the suite is small and 14 pax in this size cabin is still a big negative. Sorry BA, but DL's new Business Elite seat comes to mind. Probably not a comparison that they were looking for.

No effing way that any one is going to be happy sitting in that buddy seat.

Which has a bizarre lower position.

Personal closet with enough room to actual hang an item or two. With a front door that make it easy to stow and access items.

Another negative about the 14-pax-in-too-small-a-cabin thing is lack of personal storage space. This is it...

...shared with the IFE controls...

Contrast that to Malaysia and the amazing storage space...

And yet another airline that decided not to spend a little more on Bose and instead spec a garbage cheaper headset...

Special A380 PJs and amenity kit

I'd heard positive comments about the enhanced food and wine on the A380 flights so I was interested in checking it out.

Today's menu...

The tasting menu certainly looks very good.

But the surprise was the wine list. OK, seriously impressive including two wines that are in our cellar as inexpensive but great staples.

Merry Edwards Russian River Sauvignon Blanc.    One of the best California SBs not named Araujo.

And Napanook, an excellent Napa Cab blend from Dominus.

The A380 IFE system looks to be huge step-up from other BA IFEs we've seen, with a much larger selection of options.

Overall assessment of BA's A380: A major improvement for BA over the rather weak F hard product on other BA metal. The food and wine options looked very strong. But in the end, it still feels like a J+ product and except for the food and beverage, not much different from Delta's Business Elite product.

And it pales in comparison to every other A380 I've flown... Emirates, Malaysia, Lufthansa and Korean. Each of those offer a far more spacious cabin and seating. Nothing demonstrates the differences like the A380 lavs which are in part a function of BA's decision to put the F cabin on the lower level.

BA A380 First Class lav...

EK A380 First Class lav...

LH A380 First Class lav...

By now, we are 15 minutes past our departure time and the captain announced that we have a brief delay as they needed to offload a bag of a no-show passenger, and clear up a "very minor technical issue". We should be on our way to Los Angeles shortly.

Tic-toc-tic-toc. Yep, that looks inviting. 

About an hour later, our "very minor technical issue" has turned into a fuel leak with fumes so strong that BA mechanics are unable to fix the problem and that, "so sorry" but unfortunately, the A380 will not be flying today. Instead, BA has substituted a 747 and rescheduled the flight to an 8:00PM 744 departure.  While mechanicals happen and I'd rather they find the problem on the ground, not too impressive with how BA handles IRROPS. Cabin crew announced that F pax would be let off first, rebooking agents would be at the top of the escalator/stairs at the gate to assist with rebooking and/or new BPs. LOL. Ten minutes later, everyone was let off all at once. The only staff at the gate were two agents handing out £10 World Traveler vouchers.

Down the C concourse, the 5 person Customer Service desk couldn't process any changes and didn't even know the LAX flight had been cancelled. Told us to walk thru the underground walkway to the B lounge. I was the first in line with rebooking agent at 4:25P. Naturally, she didn't know anything about the LAX flight. Tried to get her to rebook us on the wide open 5:00PM IAD flight which would at least get us home tonight. Of course by that time (4:25P) "sorry sir, that flight is already closed". Same story when she called someone else.  So how about seat assignments to LAX? Since 2EF doesn't exist on the 744, naturally we've been assigned 5AK, on the opposite side of the cabin. At least we're closest to the galley and the loos. 

I have now come to the conclusion that BA and I are simply not destined to be. I don't fly them that much, but when I do, wow. But wait, it gets even better.

Coming up:
Another comical BA flight, SFO777 is threatened with arrest at LAX by a matronly FA and Mrs. SFO warns me "Do not ever book me on another British Airways flight"

BA Galleries B Lounge

OK, we're stuck here for another couple of hours so let's make the best of it. And in many ways, this lounge is better than the CCR. More comfortable seating areas, with power outlets everywhere. Spacious and a nice open feeling.

Food likes like a typical Business Class lounge offerings but actually looked better than the pathetic options on the CCR menu. And what a concept, browse and serve yourself food, snacks and bar.

At around T-50, we headed out back to C. More BA brilliance on display as it's now a guessing game as to how to get downstairs to the tunnel or train. Yes, there is an elevator, but the lower level button was restricted to "Employees". So we got to the level above and then walked down the stairs to the level that was restricted to "Employees". Yeah, that makes as much sense as everything else today. OK, train or tunnel? No one waiting for a train so we decide to take the sure thing. Yep, this is really attractive...

And to Gate C53 at the far end of C and now clogged with gate lice. Of course, had BA designed this sucker properly, there would be more than 15 feet between the terminal walls and or gate area. The result is predictable chaos. Too many pax in too small an area with no one able to move.

British Airways BA269
London LHR to Los Angeles LAX
B747-400
3:00P-6:05P (original sked)
4:05P (cancelled)
8:00P-11:05P (revised sked)
9:35P-12:35A +1 (actual)
December 4, 2013
Seats 2EF relocated to 5A and 5K

As we waited and waited to board, our 8:00P departure came and went. Boarding was finally announced around that time. The good news was the gate agent announced boarding to First Class only. The bad news is all the gate lice blocking the way. Fortunately, BA staffers were escorting Victoria's Secret model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley thru the masses and we followed along.  Not the A380, but in a small victory today, at least it wasn't old First. A tour around the Business Class, um I mean First Class cabin. Call it what you want but 14 pax in the pointy end of a 744 is not First Class.

And the seat.

I like the look of the automatic window shades.

Thin closet for one jacket and perhaps a shirt.

And floor level cubby for... shoes??

Blanket, PJs and amenity kit...

IFE... meh. Poor selection of movies and not even close to IFE on great airlines like SQ or EK. Not even close to the selection on BA A380.

Mercifully, after more delays caused by no show pax, a sick pax requiring EMS and offloading luggage and said sick pax, we push about 75 minutes after our revised schedule departure time.

Finally in the air.

OK I understand that this crew was called in at the last minute but it was obvious that BA does not have a coherent plan, or practice how to substitute aircraft. Naturally no tasting menu on the 744, actually no menu at all as catering forgot to load. Uh-oh. Kudos to the crew for improvising although I don't think our FA expected me to ask if I could take a pic.

Reminiscent of our SFO-LHR strike flight a few years ago.

I had a couple of G&Ts and then made the mistake of asking about the wine selections. No wine list as well, but our FA did remember the William Fevre Grand Cru Chablis. OK, a ray of hope. Unfortunately, our FAs forgot or didn't realize that they needed to chill white wine. It was room temperature. Ice cools it quickly but then dilution sets in... not my friend tonight.

The setup and tonight's amuse bouche... duck with sweet chili sauce. This was actually pretty good.

I had the warm artichoke wild mushroom frittata starter. Was OK.

And for my main... I was given the choice of and ordered the Chicken "Tika Massalla". Unfortunately, just before he was about to serve the main, an hour after I had ordered it, he discovered that there was no more Chicken Tikka Massala for the Emerald in 5A. "Sorry, but it was a popular choice tonight." Really, you didn't know that earlier? No, I don't want any of the other options thank you. How about a J meal? In the end I wound up with a terrible dry chicken from Business Class.

For dessert, no idea. It wasn't on the menu but it was pretty good.

On one of my trips to the loo, I stopped by the snack counter. Perhaps this crew does indeed believe that champagne and white wine should be served at room temp, as both the LPGC and Fevre Chablis were sitting on the counter in a +22 degree cabin, not on ice. Oy.

With my body clock still on Maldives time and a garbage IFE compared to the A380 and other airlines (even SriLankan has better IFE on its A320), I worked most of the flight and didn't bother to sleep in way too narrow seats. That was until the power gave out as I was unable to recharge my MacBook Pro. My 110 plug wouldn't fit into the outlet. Is BA really the only airline on the planet that has 220 volt only power outlets in First Class. Even with an adapter, I could not keep my MacBook Pro charged.

And finally, there was this bizarre mid-flight conversation with a "senior" battle-ax type FA who stopped by to tell me "The Captain is concerned that you may be taping announcements and taking pictures of cabin crew. The company frowns on this especially in the era of social media and The Captain has alerted security in Los Angeles". Seriously??? Since I was doing neither and my pics were only of food, drink and cabin pics without any people except Mrs. SFO (and which the FA acknowledged was entirely permissible), I can only assume this little "conversation" was generated by either (1) a sensitive-to-criticism BA "insider" that read flyertalk.com and alerted operations, perhaps in some stupid attempt to intimidate me from expressing my opinion, or (2) cabin crew embarrassed that I was documenting numerous service failures tonight. I offered to show her my pics but she declined and apparently that was end of it, as neither LAPD nor Homeland Security was at the gate to cuff and escort me off for questioning or an overnight in the airport jail.

As we disembarked, even Mrs. SFO opined that she hated the seat, the cabin, the crew that "behaved like they were doing us a favor by being there" and warned me "don't ever book me on another BA flight."

On a positive note, a BA rep was waiting as we deplaned with our hotel voucher. Naturally, BA's fine treatment of revenue F pax continued as we were given a voucher for the lovely Sheraton Four Points LAX. 

And no S class limo here tonight as we crowd into our luxurious LAX shuttle bus and head off for the 5 minutes trek to Terminal 2. Supposedly, TBT arrivals was closed by the time we arrived.

Global Entry worked great tonight and the Sheraton Four Points shuttle picked us up 5 minutes later.

What more can I say about BA? They are the most over-rated airline in the world. Why anyone other than flag-waving Brits would willingly buy or even use miles for a First Class ticket on this pathetic excuse for an airline is beyond me. Add in the exorbitant YQ and UK fees and it's an even worse proposition.

And a postscript to our BA saga...

I received a call from BA on in response to my letter to Frank Van Der Post, BA's Sr. VP Customer Experience. The woman that called was from BA's Executive Club department and indicated that Mr. Van Der Post had asked her to call.

Not a very satisfying conversation. Rather it seemed more like a canned response that she was reluctantly forced to make because Van Der Post asked her. She apologized for the service issues on our flight and indicated that they are working to improve their response during mechanicals. Blah, blah, blah.

When I pressed her on the "threat" made to me, she opined that perhaps I had misinterpreted the comments. But when I asked whether they had questioned or planned to question the crew, she said they had no interest in investigating and even if they did, they would not share the results or responses with me. Seriously??

She again apologized for the service failure perhaps hoping that I would say "thank you so much. I appreciate the call". When I said "That's it? You just called to apologize?", she reluctantly added that as a gesture, they would add 50,000 Avios to my account, and only after my prompting, a similar amount to Mrs. SFO's account. Not that we'll ever use them on BA, but as long as we can redeem them on good OW partners, it was better than nothing.

Not sure how much further I want to pursue but I'm still ticked off about BA's disinterest in investigating a clear and obvious threat. Frankly, this airline and the attitude of many of its employees is rather appalling. Fortunately, there are lot of other far better airlines that we can fly to get where we want to go.

It was nearly 1:30AM by the time we finally arrived at the luxurious Four Points LAX and more like 2:30AM by the time I fell asleep. Three hours of "sleep" and we were up at 5:30A targeting a 6:30AM shuttle. Down in the lobby, a couple dozen pax were waiting the same shuttle. After 5 minutes and no shuttle in sight, I went up to a solitary taxi and asked "how much to T7?" $10? Sold and Mrs. SFO and I hopped in and took off for LAX.   Since I had sync'd our UA reservations with our profile, we both had PreCheck on our mobile BPs and were thru security in no time. United Club? Not worth the effort. A stop for coffee and we head for our gate.

United UA1550
Los Angeles LAX to Denver DEN
757-300
8:08A-11:30A
December 5, 2013
Seats 4AB after nice guy in 4B volunteered to move to 3A.

Ouch, one tough upgrade this morning.

Friendly GA announced pre-boarding at T-55 and boarding at T-50. Wow.   Does UA have the worst gate lice in the US??

Outstanding cabin crew led by ORD-based Brian provided flawless service, taking coats and offering multiple rounds of PDB. Six rows of 2-2 in First on this packed 757-300.

Choice of raisin bran or Jeff McMuffin. Even that was better than usual as UA catering actually toasted the muffin today. Croissant or warm cinnamon bun. All in all, better service than our BA flight the night before. At least BA had to pay UA full F for our tickets.

Spectacular scenery on our way home.

OK, that looks seriously frigid. 

And back at DIA. I guess it takes time and $ to change get rid of all the "Continental" signage.

At least it's sunny to go with our -5F temps.

And the UA Dreamliner getting ready to depart for NRT.

Other than the BA debacle, what a great trip... to incredibly beautiful Maldives and on two great airlines, Etihad and Malaysia. We will definitely be back on board soon. Thanks to all for following this latest saga.